MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE ATM MACHINE (It's just a JOKE ladies)
A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:
"Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts."
"After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed.
Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
******************************
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
Unfortunately, most of this part is the Truth.!!!!
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary; with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
9 comments:
Just add "pick nose", "hawk a loogie" and "scratch ___ (fill in the blank)" into the Male Procedure and then the joke will be accurate.
Well at least i got the female part right :D
That is too good! All of us know too many ladies who live up to that... plus some.
The irate male driver caused the female to lose track of the mission at hand. The man's temper flustered her, making it impossible for her to concentrate - an easy task became difficult because of the intimidation of raging lunatic cursing at her to hurry up. If the man had not been there, the woman would have taken the same 7 steps as the previous man (possibly adding an 8th to check makeup, but only because she wanted to look good for a man she was on her way to meet).
Conclusion: Men are the cause all women's problems.
Bah-Waaaah!
Kathy need to be shut up in a looney bin.
Whatanut.
atleast not all women are like that....?
I think it should there picking there nose & pulled up to it driving 75mph slam on the brakes & ther finger goes to there brain & kills them.
at least men aren't intimidated at you women. and guess what we don't have to check are make up is int that a relief.
well Peter....
just wondering whose we..?
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