Monday, December 22, 2008

Chocolate!!!

1. If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

2. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

3. The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

4. Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.

5. A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?

6. If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?

7. If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

8. If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?

9. Money talks. Chocolate sings.

10. Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

11.Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous? A. Because no one wants to quit.

12. Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today.

That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

4 comments:

Steven said...

LOL! that is good!
I'm not sure that I'm going follow the directions, but they sure sound like good ones.

Jowy H said...

I say Ryan! BOO!!!!!!!!!!

Yet another blogger has resorted to being a monocle! Does this look familiar?

"Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Chocolate
1. If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

2. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

3. The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

4. Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.

5. A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?

6. If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?

7. If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

8. If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?

9. Money talks. Chocolate sings.

10. Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

11.Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous? A. Because no one wants to quit.

12. Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today.

That way, at least you'll get one thing done.
Posted by Jack Bauer at 9:06 PM 2 comments "


BOOOOOO!!!!

Ryan_Th3_K1d said...

AWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!


I knew i should have looked grrrrrrrr......

Ben&Brit said...

Do you actually like chocolate that much?