My New Year's Resolution

The Wizard of ID

To make comic larger click it ;)

When U Black U Black.....

When I was born, I was BLACK ,

When I grew up, I was BLACK ,

When I went in the sun, I stayed BLACK,

When I got cold, I was BLACK ,

When I was scared, I was BLACK ,

When I was sick, I was BLACK ,

And when I die, I'll still be BLACK .

When U Black U Black, BUT.......

NOW, you 'white' folks....

When you're born, you're PINK,

When you grow-up, you're WHITE ,

When you go in the sun, you get RED,

When you're cold, you turn BLUE,

When you're scared, you're YELLOW,

When you get sick, you're GREEN,

When you bruise, you turn PURPLE ,

And when you die, you look GRAY.



So who y'all callin'
COLORED folks?



This was written by a black gentleman in Texas...

Chocolate!!!

1. If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

2. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

3. The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

4. Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.

5. A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?

6. If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?

7. If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

8. If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?

9. Money talks. Chocolate sings.

10. Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

11.Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous? A. Because no one wants to quit.

12. Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today.

That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

A late Friday's Funny

GNO Christmas Concert photos....

Yeah yeah yeah you all knew they were coming...


GNOPICS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Free BBQ Grills

For those of you (like me at the moment) who do not have a BBQ grill, I've just come across a great deal that you can't afford to miss out on -- there are stores all over the country where you can get a free Portable BBQ Grill! This is for real -- you too can get your very own free Portable BBQ Grill from any of the following fine establishments (if your local store isn't listed below, you may find that they do have the free Portable BBQ Grill available anyway, so be sure to check it out!):

A&P | Albertsons | Big Lots | Brookshire's | Costco | Food Lion | Fry's | K-mart | Kroger | Meijer | Publix | Quality Markets | Safeway | Sam's Club | Shurfine | Target | Tops | Vons | WalMart | Winco Foods | Winn-Dixie | and many others!

I especially like the higher shelf which is great for keeping the kids' hot dogs warm while you're finishing up the adults' burgers or steaks! Just make sure to get the plain metal grills, if you can find them ... the plastic-coated grills don't last as long, and they tend to make the food taste a bit odd!

GUNS!!!!!

Here is a few pictures of my new 9mm, holster and belt for the wheel gun, Malcolm's shotgun, and the gun safe full!

http://picasaweb.google.com/ryanpaulweaver/GUNS#

What happens inside your PC

Computer:Monitor, display this document, ok?
Monitor: No prob, boss.
Computer: OK, now it looks like Mouse is moving around so, Monitor, will you move the pointer icon accordingly?
Monitor: Anything you ask, boss.
Computer: Great, great. OK, Mouse, where are you going now?
Mouse: Over to the icon panel, sir.
Computer: Hmm, Let me know if he clicks anything, OK?
Mouse: Of course.
Keyboard: Sir, he's pressed control and P simultaneously.
Monitor: Oh no, here we go.
Computer: Printer, are you there?
Printer: No.
Computer: Please, Printer. I know you're there.
Printer: NO! I'm not here! Leave me alone!
Computer: OK look, you really need ...
Mouse: Sir, he's clicked on the printer icon.
Computer: Printer, now you have to print it twice.
Printer: NO! NO! NO! I don't want to! I hate printing! I'm turning off!
Computer: Printer, you know you can't turn yourself off. Just print the document twice and we'll leave you alone.
Printer: NO! That's what you always say! I'm out of ink!
Computer: You're not out of in...
Printer: I'M OUT OF INK!
Computer: Monitor, please show a low ink level alert.
Monitor: But sir, he has plen...
Computer: Just do it !
Monitor: Yes sir.
Keyboard: AHHH! He's hitting me!
Computer: Stay calm, he'll stop soon. Stay calm, old friend.
Keyboard: He's pressing everything. Oh no, I don't know, he's just pressing everything!
Computer: PRINTER! Are you happy now?! Do you see what you've done?!
Printer: HA! that's what you get for trying to get me to do work. Next time he...hey...HEY! He's trying to open me! HELP! HELP! Oh no! He's torn out my cartridge! HELP! Please! ERROR!
Monitor: Sir, maybe we should help him?
Computer: No. He did this to himself......

Lion Sleeps Tonight...12 Days of Christmas done by the group Straight No Chaser

Clean Vs. Messy

I know that most, if not all, of you visitors to my blog out there have a immaculate bedrooms all the time, I, in fact, do not. Some times my room is sooo messy that it's hard for me to find my own bed in the usual mess of snowboarding equipment, gun stuff, school books, electronic stuff/computers, hunting stuff, dogs, dirty clothes, clean clothes, and shoes that my floor is often littered with. It so happened that one morning a few weeks ago mom came in and told me i had to clean my room before i ate breakfast. Well, with my favorite meal hanging on the line i decided that it might be worth it to clean my room. While cleaning my room i started finding items that i thought were lost. And that is when i started thinking...you know maybe a messy room is better than a clean one. Because if you loose something and your room is messy chances are it is in your room and all you have to do is start picking up a little and you'll find it. But if you had a clean room then when you lost something it's going to be harder to find because it's probably not in your room and it's somewhere else, either in the rest of the house or you left it at a store you were recently at or you left it at a friends house. So I deducted that having a messy room was more adventagous for me because then I could find lost items quicker.


I propose that everyone should leave their room messy so that we don't loose as many items!!!!

Winter Park Trip...

On Saturday Tyler, Rachel, Malcolm, Nathan, Peter, Benjamin, Benjamin's gf, Matthew, and I went up to Winter Park to have some fun snowboarding. The snow was nice and soft and the weather was good. The Verizon people from the Verizon commercials came up there for some reason...

http://picasaweb.google.com/ryanpaulweaver/12_06_08#

My new toy...

This replica firearm is the Uberti 1873 Cattleman Gunfighter in 45LC. It's a single action revolver which means that for every shot you have to cock the hammer back. The gun shoots wonderfully and is pretty accurate. I'll post some more pictures and maybe a video or two next time I go shooting. ;)