Brain Food

A customer at Green's Gourmet Grocery marveled at the proprietor's quick wit and intelligence.

"Tell me, Mr. Green, what makes you so smart?"

"I wouldn't share my secret with just anyone," Mr. Green replies, lowering his voice so the other shoppers won't hear. "But since you're a good and faithful customer, I'll let you in on it. It's fish heads. You eat enough of them, you'll be positively brilliant."

"You sell them here?" the customer asks.

"Only $4 apiece," says Mr. Green.

The customer buys three. A week later, he's back in the store complaining that the fish heads were disgusting and he isn't any smarter.

"You haven't eaten enough yet," says Mr. Green. The customer goes home with 20 more fish heads. Two weeks later, he's back and this time he's really angry.

"Hey, Mr. Green," he says, "You're selling me fish heads for $4 a piece -- I just realized that I can buy the whole fish here for just $2. You're ripping me off!"

"There now, you see that?" says Mr. Green. "You've gotten smarter already."

When U Black U Black.....

When I was born, I was BLACK ,

When I grew up, I was BLACK ,

When I went in the sun, I stayed BLACK,

When I got cold, I was BLACK ,

When I was scared, I was BLACK ,

When I was sick, I was BLACK ,

And when I die, I'll still be BLACK .

When U Black U Black, BUT.......

NOW, you 'white' folks....

When you're born, you're PINK,

When you grow-up, you're WHITE ,

When you go in the sun, you get RED,

When you're cold, you turn BLUE,

When you're scared, you're YELLOW,

When you get sick, you're GREEN,

When you bruise, you turn PURPLE ,

And when you die, you look GRAY.



So who y'all callin'
COLORED folks?



This was written by a black gentleman in Texas...

The Difinitive Test of True Love!

Take your wife and your dog and lock them in the trunk of your car for an hour. When you open your trunk see which one is glad to see you...

Engineers...

There are four engineers traveling in a car; a mechanical engineer, a chemical engineer, an electrical engineer and a computer engineer. The car breaks down.

“Sounds to me as if the pistons have seized. We’ll have to strip down the engine before we can get the car working again”, says the mechanical engineer.

“Well”, says the chemical engineer, “it sounded to me as if the fuel might be contaminated. I think we should clear out the fuel system.”

“I thought it might be an grounding problem”, says the electrical engineer, “or maybe a faulty plug lead.”

They all turn to the computer engineer who has said nothing and say: “Well, what do you think?”

“Ummm, perhaps if we all get out of the car and get back in again?”

Making the world happy

The Gores and the Clintons are flying on Air Force One. Bill looks at Al, chuckles and says, "You know, I could throw a $100.00 bill out the window right now and make one person very happy."
Al shrugs his stiff shoulders and says, "Well, I could throw ten $10.00 bills out the window and make 10 people very happy."
Hillary tosses her perfectly hair-sprayed hair and says, "Of course, then, I could throw one hundred-$1.00 bills out the window and make a hundred people very happy."
Chelsea rolls her eyes, looks at all of them and says, "I could throw all of you out the window and make the whole country happy!"